After months of research and soul searching we decide to make some final decisions on the adoption front. We extensively researched some programs: Russia, Kazakhstan, Republic of Georgia and Azerbaijan. While other programs were quickly ruled out: China, Vietnam, Korea and Guatemala.
Shortly before we began our homestudy we did an online course called 'Eyes Wide Open' about preparing to adopt. Me and husband sat at the computer one night to take the course. One of the assignments were to close your eyes and visualize the child you will adopt. So as I sat there, eyes closed imagining my Russian child something odd happened, the baby I visualized was NOT Russian. He was Latino! And resembled none of the pictures I have been combing over the past year. I tried to clear my head, closed my eyes and again the same baby with black hair and Latino features appeared. I don't remember what my husband said he saw in his mind but I wouldn't be surprised if he was really trying to remember if the chocolate chip cookies were still in the cabinet.
If we were adopting from Russia, why did a Latino boy pop up in my head?? Guatemala wasn't even on the short list of programs we considered. I had briefly read about the program and the private lawyer factor and birthmother involvement in the process scared me. But I needed this to make sense to me. Was the powers that be trying to send me a message??? It bugged me. I obsessed about it. Why was I making such a big deal over this exercise? What does it really mean? Actually for me, it meant a lot. I always believed everything happens for a reason. And people should listen when there are 'signs' or when the universe 'whispers' in your ear. So could that cute Latino boy in my mind be 'a sign' or 'a whisper' from the universe? I decided to run with it. I pulled out all the literature I had on Guatemala. I read and read and read. Then I felt it, the feeling of everything coming together. The pieces of the puzzle magically assembling itself in front of me. OK, change of plans, we are adopting from Guatemala.
